Finding New Friends Isn’t Easy
I HAVE FRIENDS JUST NOT IN VA (REALLY)
I was going to make a post about job search first, and that is in the works, but today, something happened, and it took over my entire day. It was about friendship, comfort, safety, and trust.
I want to say I have made some pretty, what I would like to say not dumb but hasty decisions when it comes to who i decide to let around me, friends, men, women, but mostly guys.
I am not going to lie; I learned my lesson once, twice, maybe three times, and I did learn it in the moment. But I made the same mistake, thinking the outcome would change.
friendships
from pintrest
I will tell anyone that I enjoy a males/men presence before a girls/women because it always feels messy, there’s consistent arguing fight and more. I just dont like it. For men you put them on game, they put you on game, and you go out have a good time and protect each other. That is all. Everyman is not cut from the same cloth and I know that, so it is more hard to tell who real whose fake. While, also dealing with emotions and feelings that could arise because you are of the opposite sex.
I told my bestfriend today and yes he is a guy, that I semi understand the statement boys and girls can not be platonic. It is semi because I do think subconsciously when we pick and choose a friend of the opposite sex, they are not ugly (in their eyes). It is the sentiment, anybody around aint going to be looking rough (whatever you standards are) but we also choose are friendships off of connection and vibe.
Anyways today I was planning on hanging out with one of my homeboys (HB) but he was with someone (Al, I personally already had a negative run-in with and he knows about it (my homeboy). But, due to me not seeing him in a minute i said forget it I’ll see him. They wanted to come over but I was not comfortable with Al coming to my house. So I ended up meeting them out. Anyways we leave the place I went to meet them at and it was like we are going to my house next. So I panic because when I realized what was happening, I called my cousins to be like what do i do. I do not like being an ass hole, but I felt being like no and the question of why being asked and I am like because I dont want you in my space and you make me uncomfortable. ps. he is. a family friend. I a lot event happened after that but it not about that.
After talking to cousin I am in my head questioning something. Like what is men intention as friends when you are looking for new friend? If you are constantly thinking it bad if you have preference of male friends as women how do you gain new friends? Do you settle for the girlfriends even though you do not mesh. My boyfriend can not be my only friend.
I am also wondering if my HB is really a friend if he put me in this situation and knew the background?
To top all off i just went through some other friendship drama and at this point I just want some solid ass (excuse my french)
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